@Delcaniner @Cethic Well, past is past…now, guess the right way by now is looking further to the future. That was the longest text i ever wrote on here and guess you really don‘t need to blame yourself for it.
I would doing it with an older person, but i was too shy, if someone has something seeable negative doing, but it‘s not an really big match (by thinking it deeply), like kill someone with no rights, well than this would be an problem, but by anything else which goes away it isn‘t an real deal.
Therea lot of psychological pre matured kids out there, who wants to know something. There are a lot of ironical senses in the world, which disturbs others, like „if the world wouldn‘t make any sense without an enemy image“… etc.
https://docs.google.com/document/u/3/d/11SZyxXuC7xLRCanKKZuNZqWCChMOL2W0D4_nXCrZdAM/edit
Cethic
@Cethic
Age 27
Freelance Artist
Limbo
Joined on 7/11/11
- Rank:
- Civilian
- Global Rank:
- > 100,000
- Blams:
- 2
- Saves:
- 25
- B/P Bonus:
- 0%
- Whistle:
- Normal
- Trophies:
- 29
- Medals:
- 70
- Supporter:
- 11m 29d
Comments
@Delcaniner @Cethic It‘s all psychology, it hits harder in the first place, because it‘s hard to imagine how hard it‘s really is in the first time. It‘s like the psyche wants to have it easier or cheaper to not lose it‘s own existence or power.
That explains probably why some smart peoples are lazy to someone else or they find them „dumb“(i hate to say that word)…
@Delcaniner @Cethic i think your doing a pretty good job, it takes alot to change yourself for the better and i think your pretty cool person for trying to change and also admitting to doing bad things in the past and owning up to it, hope you have a great day dude,
To be honest again, that's not really the worsed thing what can happen.
At least you could experience those stuff( of course it's not really that nice which is wished) in that young age (i envy you an little), i was not very social in my youth-hood, mostly alone ( because of many persimistic thoughts i even ignored social media, which is an reason why i didn't made an account here earlier).
Life can be ironic as hell... it's actually an devils circle.
Big wishes can have big problems, but sometimes it has to be like this.
Nothing is made for ever, but it's still sad to see them passing away.
What the fuck lol
What a virgin lol !!
val this u? ok :(
@Tuvster pretty much
Well this is a shitty situation :/
I'm planting my feet and staying though, cause i thought you were a cool person back then, and honestly, despite all of this, you still are now even tho we don't talk much anymore lol.
You have me on discord, and given a huge amount of why I’ve been busy was just lifted off of me, I’m more open than ever.
I know we had that awkward period where I was dating your ex and I’m sorry about that, but if you want to chat you have my steam and discord.
Look from the things that you did was fucking disgusting for everyone I can't even describe how disappointed I am and actually not only you, there are people like Sean who being pedophiles and rape Innocent people which Is a fucking disgrace but cethic what I read about you was another whole level, as a piece of advice now that people hate you It's a great chance to relax from the Internet and think what you fucking did. I thought you were the ones that stayed out of things Illegal stuff If you may. I won't talk much further.
I wouldn’t equate them due to age and intent. What happened with will falls under accidental sexual assault from what I’ve been told legally, and legally in my state as well everything we did was fine since we didn’t have a 4 year age gap and were dating.
I did extremely poorly handle that discord server, but unlike Sean I never went out of my way to prey on, send nudes to, and surround myself with a large amount of teenage girls. Most of the people in that server were adult men, and I myself wasn’t even in my 20s yet. I was 18.
That’s not to excuse what I did, or the things I said, as they’re truly awful, vile, embarrassing, and can’t be taken back. But please do not equate me to a man who was so much older than I was getting caught preying on and surrounding himself with a ton of teenage girls for the express purpose of pedophilic sexual desire.
I am taking this as a chance to step back, though. I’ve been focusing more time into my relationship and friends instead of creating, to great benefits to my mental health.
Sorry for the lengthy response.
@Cethic water under the bridge, also can't seem to find ya on discord. Cause I actually wanted to dm ya, but noffin is popping up to start a chat with
@MrVC @Cethic yeah tbh sean was worse but man what you've done isn't better, look man just take a deep breath and relax sorry for equating you but I can't compare things well but that doesn't mean I am still not disgusted and angry. Sean did other things you did other things so I can't really compare them or equate you and sean
Sorry if my reply came off aggressive, none of what I did was good and terrible things will always be terrible things. It’s just that he creeped on me too, no shade your way man.
wow this is really crazy you and Will went though. I feel like it beyond cyber bulling. I just hope you be well.
You got balls to talk about these things. And as much some things you did disgust me, it would be immature of oneself to judge your word in these standards. Let your work be as it is, and now focus on improving yourself.
Ig itd be better if i just didnt read this all shit. It seems that nothing will surprise me today. Eh.
bruh
what the fuck man
fuck you then
o7 m8s
Delcaniner
As long the consequences doesn't effects you to the future, there is not really an extremely need of fear.
I was in my youth (childhood) too in some kind of adult stuff(not really into arts, but mostly xxx websides) Got found by my self Shadmans(Shadling, Shadbase etc., who knows) stuff(not really that hard).
Guess those little angers of you ( by saying terrible things ) are some kind of frustration (negative depression probably).
I got in my years (age of 10) 5. class (elementary school) some anger issues too, because of my past (bully...etc.), which leads me to say "I kill you all - I KILL YOU ALL!!!" (when i'm feel insulted or offened) it's not every day the teacher(female not the youngest) gets attentive.
Weeks later and in those weeks by days when something falls to my mind negative(offened) i say that. Guess my outstanding way by ignoring the other kids(not really cooperative) attents my teacher too. She didn't use some violents on me. Just talk to that she said that she fears that i would do something bad or worse in the future, i answer her that this wouldn't happen. That anger still goes days later. My mom was called and she should get me to some adolescent psychiatry by an doctor. The meeting to that doctor was on an after school-day, when my mother had time to it.
The result say's i'm totally normal. Guess it's somekind of deep psychiologistic issues of me.
When i say those words ("I kill you all") i know that this isn't true, just haven't not enough controll to not say that.
Time to time my anger falls and everything went normal.
By during Highschool was something simmilar to that, but by saying those words ("I kill you)
and it was surprisingly easier to handle that. Because i got more knowledges.
(To be honest i got an fear of death since my earliest childhood, lonelyness either, since when i was 10 i started to masturbate ( in my deepest mind probably randomly once or second or even third time when i was even younger). I read since last year that pre sexuality is genetical and not 100% psychic. I had many doubts in my childhood. Even some girls find me cute or attractive i rejected to them even i find them good or okay...
This is simmilar to the highschool too.
I liked to play of legal age games like (Resident evil, Prototype, Dead Space etc.) mostly horror games or movies.
Which hardens me up, i was shy during my childhood.
I remember when i was 8 or 9, that i said in my mind i need to harden up to go though the problems, the softness inside me was nearly naive so...yeah...
I was self centered too and mean in some kind, but i felt this isn't right.
By all those negative thinkings and feelings i throw many things away which i regret tuntil today.
Aaaand ... yeah... i was into "Zoophile" too, but to be honest i never ever had sexual experiences whith someone or something.
I was deep meaningly thinking in my youth, but throw that away (because i thought that's enough and time to get something easier, but that was naive in some kind) and got it back.
Scince 2017 again, but with many negative thoughts(hate, depression etc.)..., but now positive and rightful.
Cethic
It’s very easy to get twisted up online when you’re young, especially back then. Parents were not as aware of the dangers that lurked online, and many of us were left twisted as a result. All we can do is try to untwist ourselves and move on from that muck, lest we steep and remain submerged.
I’m glad you found your way out of that hell hole.